Guest Quote

"Damn. I lost my phone. I don't understand. It's red! It's like the Hiroshima of phones and it's sexalicious and I always lose it. I'm a bad mother."

"If you let me penetrate your asshole I'll give you my ticket."

"Bah. Tallahassee spiders are like the pansies of the spider world. They play spider D&D and wear spider pocket protectors."

"I've never had an apple pie I didn't like. I've never had ANY pie I didn't like."

"Up mine!"

Guest Quote

"It's the most amazing story I can't remember."

"I. Look. Awesome."

"I love my mother fuckin' toes."

"Do you mean dirty like the dirty things I wish I could do to you or dirty like the dirty things I'd never do to anyone?"

"Everybody knows baby AIDS is cuter than regular AIDS."

Guest Quote

"I'm not a little skank whore. I don't want to do anything with you that will upset Graham."

"Oh shut up you know you do."

"Hey. I'm David Korver. I'm the most attractive guy on campus."

"If we pulled down the wallpaper in here there'd probably be heroine and money packed inside the walls. That's how sketchy this place is."

"Sure, you don't have a car, but at least you don't have a Jason. He's a communist and a womanizer and possibly a carnivore. He may or may not have eaten his last owner. I'm not sure."

"This bed smells like fornication and bad consciences."

"If acid doesn't do what we want it to, we have fruity loops."

"Fix everything you dumb shit!"

"Micah, the crabs you get on your pubes are real animals. They're alive. They look like lice."

"What, really? Can you feed them?"

Introduction to the Quote Board

This quote board represents the cumulative verbal flashes of brilliance experienced by a small group of friends who attend school at a private Christian college. The board will be mostly devoted to these impressive young men, but will also include "Guest Quotes", or quotes by people that this circle of friends respect or, at the very least, want to mock by posting their words online.

A brief warning: Just because we're Christians doesn't mean shit. If you're easily offended, turn back now, bitch.